That Damn Woman!!!!!!!!

Today was a trying day. Elmo and Naruto were home because we had (well, they had) their weekly appointments at Prodigy. We were only 15 min late but I almost didn't get there on time. Better late than never.

Then CHUBS came over. I was in a mood. Not a good one. Naruto decided that he could destroy the house during quiet time. There is no such thing as quiet time around my house. I needed a nap. Today took a toll out of me.

Then CHUBS came over. She pitched a hissy fit over FOUR Cheerios being in the entrance way. FOUR WHOLE CHEERIOS. She has to tell CPS I had food on the floor. Elmo was sitting there eating the cereal about 30 minutes before she got there. He's four. He is not a neat eater so he got some on the floor. The house looks horrible because the kids destroy it on a daily basis.

Never mind the fact that I was in a depressed mood. I couldn't find some of my things because Naruto was in my space. He better get over this "space problem" before I have to get nasty and ugly. I'm tired of him in my room. I'm tired of him messing with crap he has no business messing with.

I sent the kids outside in the backyard to play. Naruto decided that he wanted to play in the front yard. So, he climbed over the fence and got two huge gashes on his back. He doesn't like the backyard. He's allergic to anything out there. He likes the front yard. No fence around the front yard. So, he climbs over the fence on a regular basis. Today, it was only four times before I made him come inside, which is really what he wanted. But mama turned off Cartoon Network. No one can watch anything until I get ready to turn it back on.

If he could do Cartoon Network in a moderate level, I could live with that. But it's all the time. I hate Ed, Edd, and Eddy with their scams. What are they teaching Naruto? Camp Lazlo is the same. You can do whatever you want to do and bend the rules to do it. It doesn't matter. I really want to break the tv set for a while. If I had a landline, then maybe I could switch to a DSL connection instead of cable net. I do enjoy Cartoons myself but I'm able to distinguish what is good from what is the absolute rubbish. I'm grown. He's seven.

But that woman backed me in the corner. She's going to tell CPS about four cheerios on the floor. I told her to go ahead. I don't give a damn anymore. I WANT THESE IDIOTS OUT OF MY HOUSE. I WANT THEM OUT OF MY LIFE. EVERYONE OF THEM. If you have handicapped kids, you know the pressure I'm under. I don't know how SewPaula does it with the Divine Em. But the problem is that unless you have lived with autistic kids or are autistic yourself, you know squat about my life and my house. I yelled at her for some time. You back a dog in a corner and torture him, he's going to come out fighting. He's going to do whatever it takes to get the torturer to back off of him and leave him alone. I'm not going to let her in the house. She has to come but we can meet at other places. McD, BK, the park...it doesn't matter. The boys would love to go to McD or BK for a pop and the other kids to play with. Tomorrow night, she has to come over. We can easily sit outside on the steps. The boys can be outside just as easily as we are. They can play in the front yard, which Aharon is not allergic to. When she's gone, we'll be better. How much longer until Sept? We should be free of CPS and CHUBS. I don't trust her anymore. She lost all respect I had for her. Pure and simple. She knows what she's doing, I'll admit, but she knows NOTHING about autism and all the problems associated with it. Nor does she know the problems (and hasn't been there) that I as a simple handicapped parent with two handicapped kids go through. Yes, they can go to daycare, but not when they are going to be there 2 hours. Not worth my time and gas money.

Gas is finally going back down. It's less than $2.80 here in places. I don't know how people do it with cars and gas payments. The woman three houses down doesn't have a car. Others take her to Walmart or she rides the KATS bus. Easy for her. I have to pay $6 for us to go to Walmart and back. They don't do a monthly plan. I would be glad to use that myself. Three bus passes for a month's driving would be more than worth it. But unfortunately, they don't do passes here. *rolls eyes*

CPS suggested a boarding school for Auties in Tulsa. Sorry, I do not think that I'll send Naruto. He'd be around auties 168 hours a week and none around normal kids. I need to get with the Podiatrist to see what she thinks, but I can almost hear her answer now. This would be like being back in foster care for Naruto, even though he'd be home on the weekends. He's only SEVEN. No, he has a good teacher and I think a lot of her. But Naruto can't play soccer or ball if he's not at any of the practices. Forget Cub Scouts. They might be the best for autistic kids, but not the best for my son. Naruto has his problems, but so does any other kids. He's just got more problems to overcome. But hiding him in an autie world will not make him a better person. It just shields him from the real world where Pokemon and super powers do not exist.

I have missed two nights of exercise because of shit. Last night, a normal 15 minute wait at Walmart was more like 45. The first appointment of the day was fine. The second one, the endo trip, was horrible. I drove around the same three block radius for 20 minutes trying to locate ONE building. So, I was late. Then they wanted to have an ultrasound done at 2. It would have been paid for by insurance but I needed it done then, not at 2. I had to get Naruto for his doc's appointment. We finally get to the doc's office at 1545 for a 1340 appointment. They have no paperwork. I'm being pushed/bullied by doctors. I do not know which way to turn anymore. We left it was after 1700. Then to go to Walmart. We got home around 1815. CHUBS was supposed to meet me at the gym at 1730. I got a nasty note and we missed a visit. I rarely miss her visits so it had to be something. Mark this up to another reason I can't deal with her. My phone had a dead battery. Sorry, CHUBS, but I'm trying to avoid using a car charger. It puts too much stress on the battery. I can't afford a new battery. I do have the car charger but still..

I'm tired. I'm sick and tired of people telling me what to do and how to clean my house. My support system is on vacation or not able to be reached. I'm frustrated with Naruto and somewhat with Elmo. I can't wait to get some meds because this is hell on me. Doesn't anyone know that? Maybe tomorrow will be better, but the past two days sure haven't.